Shorewood students blindsided by bench burglary

by Anya Farwell, Arts & Culture Editor

Benches. The piece of furniture with the cheap blue rip-off leather that fills the Shorewood halls. The one thing that many times before had comforted students in times of grief and distress, and provided an acceptable place to rest their eyes. But now as the writer I am left with the question as to why, after all the benches have provided, the school thought it was a good idea to take them away?

Photo by Anya Farwell
Edited by Eliana Megargee

As a student at Shorewood I can say that the benches were an acceptable and lovely place to catch up on your regular 30 late assignments, talk to your friends during passing, and above all, they were the absolute perfect place to catch up on sleep. Now, if you ask me this is probably the reason the school confiscated these magical blue benches, but wouldn’t teachers like it better if their student left their class to sleep, instead of snoozing in the middle of their very long lecture? I know I would. So why on earth did the school decide to deprive us of the satisfaction and bewildering essence that these benches provided?

Not only did the school take away the benches, but they also had the audacity not to replace them with uncomfortable ones. If it were me, and I was truly on a mission to deprive students of their daily nap, I would replace the anchor of the problem (aka, the benches) with some ridiculously uncomfortable wooden stool, making it nearly impossible to even enjoy sitting in it, much like the flimsy plastic chairs in every classroom that give me lower back pain. But no, the school has resorted to the plan to make us sit on the rustic, hard, and very cold school floor instead. Which in my mind is nothing short of diabolical. 

So, I call to action anyone and everyone who wants the magical benches back, this behavior shown by the school is not acceptable in the slightest and needs to be put to an end by the reinstatement of the said beautiful furniture.